SCREAMING SCARY SOUL

I was...giving all of mine in me , I was giving all of my courage , my motivation and even live my spirit life into all of this which we call this dream of us.
I DID,
but then again I think I wasn’t DOING everything good enough.
I missed something.Imperfect.

I suddenly wanna cry but I can’t
I wanna scream , as if it like I‘m in d roller coaster..but I can’t
I wanna sleep and be in another world...but I can’t
I wanna make a dream...but its all so blury
I dropped it...just in a sudden as my heartbeat stop for a second or two
I wanna tell all people , moaning , complaining ,shocking my grief onto them ,but somehow I can’t...just somehow something pull me back , hold me back , make me standing still

This pain.....so hurting me deep inside
Like something stabbed me right thorough my heart..
the worst part is... I think this pain stabbed my soul..
I’m lost...my soul is lost...
And my head is now spinning around in the deathly carousel

THEN
I drag my soul to a beautiful shiny place...and so far..
It's useless...
my soul is screaming out loud for my scary misery..
alone..there